I was telling Jason today that I used Twitter as an outlet that's much more private than Facebook.
"But doesn't that defeat the purpose?"
No, that is the purpose.
But I realize I am slowly accumulating more BU people who follow my profile. So maybe I'll update this more since not many know about this blog.
Anyways...
While I was driving back home today, I got a text message from the first person I met at Baylor. Even though the guy is nice, I began to notice today that he always only texts me when he needs something for the past 3 years ("Do you know of any office supply stores in Waco?"). Is this really a friendship? I think not. I consider it at an acquaintance level. A little irritated after the realization, I didn't respond.
But no. It's not over. It spurred a lot more thoughts. I log into Facebook and got a lovely wall of text from my best friend in my private message inbox.
My best friend and I don't really have a typical friendship. I've only hugged her once in December in the 9 years I have known her. Since she moved to Pennsylvania in 10th grade and pursued art school in Seattle, it's not the same as before the move. But we try.
After reading the huge personal message concerning her legal issues, friendship issues, and relationship issues it hit me that maybe even my best friend is using me on some level also. The more she had troubles, the more she would disclose more with me. We've never been the type to do this so it was odd at first. I thought further back in time and found it to be true.
She comes to El Paso for a weekend and...
She has no room and board. So I get a surprise call.
Then she has no ride. So I drive.
Then she had luggage issues. So I wait with her to help sort it out.
Then she brings cats. I let them stay in my room.
She needs a swimsuit. I take her to the mall.
She hasn't eaten. I set out dinner.
Then her mom wants her to stay with her grandma on the other side of town. I drive her 30 minutes over.
She gets lost in Seattle and calls me. I use Google maps to tell her directions.
She constantly barrages my Facebook chat lately to talk to me.
She asks incessantly about the process of pursuing med school.
She won't stop bugging me. I can't study anymore if I leave Facebook on.
She talks to me much, much more when she needs something.
So it's true but do I care? Nope. She actually tries to be close with me, more so lately. Therefore, I'm always willing to help her out. No doubt that she would be too.
So if my best friend had asked me for office supplies, I would Google it in an instant and respond.
Labels: deep thoughts